Attention! In coming wounded Red Sox!

I've never been so depressed after seeing the Red Sox win 3 out of 4 games on the road against tough opponents.

Our disabled list has too many players that were on my "We can't survive without them" list.

Josh Beckett... Jacoby Ellsbury... Mike Lowell... Jeremy Hermida... Victor Martinez... Dustin Pedroia...

And that's NOT including Clay Buchholz who were are all holding our collective breaths isn't too hurt.

Yeah, it was fun to beat up the National League. But guess what? The Red Sox went 16-2 against the National League in 2006 and looked like a locomotive.

Then the injuries piled up... and they missed the playoffs.

The Rays are coming in, and they are going through their OWN issues. This has become as must win series for the Red Sox. They need to hold the Rays back and keep pace in the Wild Card, which they still lead.

But everyone else on the Sox had better stay healthy. Any more injuries and they might have to resort to Meatball Surgery to fix the team!

If the Red Sox have any more injuries, it might be time to thaw out Ted's head

I mean we have access to Ted's head, don't we?

He's a lifelong Red Sox and the Sox drafted his wacko son.

Seriously, Bill Hall can't play EVERY position. We could have a cloned Splendid Splinter out in right field.

(Keep in mind everything I know about cloning I learned from the Michael Keaton film Multiplicity.)